V-Day HeyDay!

It's February, the month of love, lover's delight moments, cities are literally painted bright red because most people wear red, gifts are better in red, decorations should be red, too. Only in latter years did I encounter a myriad of lively colors apart from red. On one occasion as popularized by a shampoo, black was in fashion for this occasion. It's just a day in a year that sends a sensual kind of excitement & adventure to both young & old; as it evokes a promise of wild fantasies coming to life, wishes of a variety of "love" themes celebrated,a day & mostly night affair obviously reveled for the 'ton' to see. Not only are the 5 Star restaurants to the No Star are filled up, Drive-ins have been booked in advance,too. Fast food & Drive thru's not just in malls enjoy their fair share of merriment of the V-Day contagion. I went thru my friendster, facebook, multiply, email lists & knew who of my friends will mark this occasion as important, important but not necessary, important but too busy, have to prepare & so forth, ahahahhahahahaha, forgot the grid's name so had to enumerate instead.It's just sad that not everyone will get a piece of the action of the V-Day glamour. Didn't really gave a lot of thought to where we will celebrate Valentine's, only, this young man whom I met in one of the bazaars I joined several years back gave me this idea on what to write on my page.

Another day in the Life of Penny, February 2009 entry:

That was the year I decided to start up on a small earnventure. My sisters & I met a lot of interesting friends & villains that time. One of them is a robust & happy guy, who was also soooooooooo in love. We were celebrating Christmas Season & he is already thinking of Valentine's. As we got to know him, we learned that joining the bazaar was not his brilliant idea. Apparently, among his siblings (all male) he was the only one without a stable job. So, his mother lent him a few bucks & also supervised the preparation & cooking of all the food he exhibited every week. His stall has the most hirelings; from them we gleaned that his mother encouraged him to move his butt off the couch, to try anything he sets his mind into to help him refrain from getting drunk & avoid being branded a worthless bum at 25. He was a lucky fellow. He had lots of help from his friends who supplied him with desserts & local delicacies, all of them gave him the best & lowest price for their goods. He was is one person who is overly friendly with the ladies to the extent that he related his life story to this particular attractive girl, who's a rumormonger,known to all as the "queen of gossip". From her I gathered that he told her the reason he did all these was because he loves his girlfriend very much & he wants to let her know that he is "good at something". Sound enough reason isn't it? What's not letting well with me were a number of puzzling observations about his real relationship with his so-called girlfriend. His commitment to succeed was also in
question. Starting off on your own, being seen three (3) out of eight (8) days during the bazaar is bizarre. His excuse, he slept late because he had to wait for his girlfriend to get off work.Unknown to him we were already told that that night he also went out on a drinking spree with his friends, till the wee hours of morning.We finally got to meet the girl that month, he introduced her as his friend. I would have slapped him there & then saying that on my face & I were his girl (I'm not that brutal, just feel like pouncing him that time). Peculiar thing is normally girlfriends would raise an eyebrow & huff & puff not being introduced as the girlfriend. This girl NR - NO Reaction. She went straight to my stall & started choosing her gift packs. We all noticed that he was uneasy & very vigilant at the girl's every move. In the course of our event when he is around he & my male cousins would talk about their girlfriends as he checks out every attractive females in church. My cousin always tells me that it's amazing how he notices all those women, when he is facing the entrance most of the time instead of him. He opens his stall later than usual & was the first to leave at at night. If he aims to be a magnate he will not come close to being a tycoon associate. We spoke to him of our interest to make him one of our suppliers, not once but thrice did he fail to live up to his commitment. Disappointment, turned to disgust when he told me that he was trying to do well in his job, one he found few months after the exhibits & patching up with his girl. Okay he knows what prioritizing means in a sense. In between my sisters closer to his age told me that he beleaguers them with "cupid questions". Such as "How do you know if she really loves you? Will you go out w/me for a drink so I can talk to you about my relationship? I'm sad because she won't talk to me, what did I do wrong? Should I call her?" Give me a break please! After letting me in on this revelation my sister totally ignored his messages. That's when I started receiving his messages & asking me if my sister changed her number. He also asked if he can come by to say "Hi". Thinking nothing about it, casually told him he is welcome
here anytime. We even invited him in goodwill to some of our parties. No Show.

I should have filtered my mass messages when I sent my "How are You" greetings. HE
took that as an opportunity to let me know that he's sad. Out of curiosity, though I
already have an idea I asked why. He said that they broke up last month (December
2008). I wanted to say that's good, move on, but, restrained myself & replied that life has it's up's & down's, so sad to know about what happened (Liar!). Nothing else happened after. Two nights ago, to my surprise he showed up on our doorsteps. He looked nowhere near that dashing fellow we met several years past. Looked more like an elderly drunk skelly in fact. I was too scared to let him in, so I made up an excuse. Even my mom didn't want to let him in. I think my mother saw his sunken, sharp red eyes & had to forgo with being hospitable this one time. Unfortunately, that did not stop him from narrating his heart-breaking story.

Read on: He said their break up was triggered by a "boy's nite out party" where he was a reluctant rejoinder (ironic isn't it). He went along with his friends to avoid any misunderstanding, to preserve their friendship & relive old times. At the party their group saw this girl, whom they all want to meet. He said no one had the courage to come up to this female, so he was tasked to befriend her & introduce her
to the group. He refused at first & told them that his girl will be furious once she
learns he is instrumental in bringing in a girl to an all male group. He said they were deaf to his protests & finally did what he was told. One of the guys in that party with was a neighbor, who he later revealed was a disco fanatic, a ravager of women & one who uses "date drugs" on an unknowing victim (Yikes! Info given to bad young girls who loves to sneak out at night). A week after the party his girlfriend tried to wheedle information about the party by relaying a rumor she heard about the girl. He was astounded at how detailed she described the events. He was more flabbergasted the same day when he saw that neighbor(one he suspected who betrayed the brotherhood) picking up his girlfriend from work. Strange thing is he denied what happened at the party, because all the boys agreed that whatever transpired at the party will be their little secret. I'll give him credit for that,honouring the packs agreement. What's not right is allowing his girlfriend to take a ride with that neighbor, even if he is hurting to the high heavens. Literally ignored & was told by his girl when he confronted her "Why don't you ask him why he comes to give me a ride from work? Hmmmmm, if they were in a serious relationship then shouldn't
this girl be pacifying him instead of pushing him away, as well as laying the ground rules of loyalty in their relationship? I recalled him telling me that this man works in Subic Bay. He considers this odd & mind boggling. Is it odd because the
guy beats him to picking up his girlfriend. Or because he can't accept the fact that he moved mountains from Subic to Makati to show up on time? He tried all his might to warn, re warn & short of creating huge protest queue cards to let the girl know how vile this man's plans are for her. Things got even more complicated after they broke up, as he was accused of stalking the girl. Which is right on the money! Obviously, she would think he is harassing her as he dogs her too much, after breaking up. I told him that his purpose is noble, because all he wants to do is protect her & let her know how vicious this man is, told him that he has done his part well. He is just creating a bigger rift between them by looking out for her like a thief in the night. I realized then what's really eating him. He shyly told me that he is this girl's first boyfriend, first kiss & first lover. He asked me "I
was the first, does that not mean anything to her at all?" Obviously NO! Because the girl was the first who moved away & asked him for space. And when a woman asks
for space it's a sure sign of a falling out. He also added that they did not just did it once.Of course, silly, I was not born yesterday to not know how often it calls to the young & the restless. In fairness I was not a meany that night. Just told him point blank: "Women who fall out of love do not cry over lost virginity, you being her first does not mean that she can't move on with her life." (He may not be that great in bed, maybe that's why she wants space & wants to move on to wilder pastures)

He does not want to give up on her or rather not give up on her being his.He asked
me ; "What's wrong with me warning her about that man,he is going to make he a sex
machine, I care for her, I just want to talk to her again, she lied about her mom asking her to avoid me, why did she lie, what did I do wrong?" He added: "It will make me feel better if I can talk to her mom, about what happened between us. Do you think I should talk to her mom?" I told him again that you've done a lot already to show her you care & because of that your concern is misconstrued as a nuisance. I don't know why she lied to you, I cannot speak for her. Will it make a difference if you talk to her mom & let her know about your sexual misadventures I mean overtures?" 9How d hell does he know that he will use her as a sex machine, did he?) I can see that his mind is already made up. "I just want this chip off my shoulders, I will tell her all that's what happened to us & I will let go." Her mom likes me. She did not ask her to avoid me, I asked her mom personally. What if we get back together should I accept her?" Por Bida Hijo your so callous! I asked him a question in retort. Will you be willing to live with that fact that she lied to you? If she has already slept with this guy will you live with the memory of her being touched by another man? Will her mom liking you make her love you back? No response. I had to go in because by then my bladder was so full, so I made my grand exit by telling him that he has to go home, because it's getting late & that I will close shop soon. Politely told him to keep me posted on how he is every now & then.

Believe me his story, our conversation was longer than this. With the amount of
information I got from him & our memories of this young man I will be on my way to
making a telenovela, albeit not an original one but informative & eye opening for sure. I couldn't forget this encounter. It brought back all those things we knew about him & I can't help but wonder if he is not different from that guy he warned this girl about. Thought of the possible reasons why the girl gave him up, why when he is rich, dashing & he belongs to a respectable family; He is also one who indulges in drink, loves to party & he has not come close to his plans of being a mogul of riches since last he told us about it. It's sad to know that he is broken- hearted as Valentine's Day approaches. His Love story is one of those tragic sagas of love & life. One revelers during V-day would not like to hear. One thing is for sure he now belongs to the "Lonely Hearts & Empty Beds Club" come Valentine's. I would love to have to give him more insights but opted to keep my opinions to myself, because with him hurting that much even if he sought my advice I told him that the choice is still his. Once he makes up his mind he better not regret his actions, all he has to do is accept the consequences. Whoa! This is a lengthy entry. Till my next chikadventures.